Sometimes I'd like to just ramble on & on about what troubles me, or what interests me, or what I think about. But then I think that's not fun for YOU to read. BUT oh well.
This is for me & my record. Sometimes typing is easier for me than writing in my journal.
Well then I think to myself if this is a hobby, I'm not very good at the housewife part. The cleaning...seriously the house is messy 90% of the day. So if you plan to visit, come over after 8pm, that's when I have had time to pick up after the day. But I haven't been able to DEEP CLEAN in a long time. (friends don't be s cared to come over) Seriously though I can't remember when I mopped my floor, sad I know. And I can't stand to go into the boys bathroom because WELL...I'm sure you all understand I don't need to explain. I just don't have the oomph to get up & go crazy cleaning....maybe because I do homeschool. BUt even if I had the big kids in public school, I would have 3 rascals at home & still may not get as much cleaned as desired. Whoa is me.
You know what, when I get into these Whoa is me moods, its mostly because life is just stressful. But really who's life ISN'T stressful. In times passed when we were low on the cash & dinner ideas got hard due to the lack of variety I had in the home, I was BLESSED with inspiration to know what I COULD cook. I am thankful for that.
I am just looking in the wrong direction. I am looking back thinking of things that USED to be & not what THINGS COULD BE.
*I could be the best homeschooling MOM for my kids EVER. We have fun together...right?!
*I could be the BEST cook this side of the Mississippi (I always wanted to say that, its from a movie...not sure which one though.)
*I could have the cleanest house...OK lets be truthful, my house will never be as clean as Erin's or Leslie's, but maybe as clean as Nikki's. How does she do 7 kids & keep it nice & tidy.
*I could have a hobby. hmm......a hobby that excites me & helps me release.
But then is that me? Am I defined by the meals I cook, how clean my house is, or how well read our children are? Maybe not the first two, but so many times have I heard that Your children are a reflection of YOU. that's scary.